Remembering Baby

To our sons George and David, our lives are empty without you, all I keep thinking is why why why? We lost George at 21 weeks and 4 days when we had to make the worse "choice" of our lives. We lost David at 21 weeks and 4 days when it seemed that your brother called for you and you went to play with him, we are waiting to find out why you didn't want to stay with us. I want you both so so much that there is not a minute that passes that I do not miss you, need you, want you. At least you are together, never alone. Until we meet again, Love mummy and daddy. George 20th Nov 2005 David 7th Aug 2006

My beautiful baby boys. We spent...14 weeks together. And our time to-gether was the most...trying period in my life so far. You know, I'm only 15 years old. Your father is 16. With my medical condition (I have low Von Willebrand's factor. It means my blood doesnt clot easily), he thought it best that I had an abortion. I spent the first 5 weeks debating whether I should or not. He finally convinced me to. It took us...actually, up until 2 weeks ago to get the $450. 8 days ago, I went to a Netflix showing of Clerks in Marine Park in Red Bank. A man walked up to me and punched me in the stomach. I was in such pain the next few days. That Saturday I went to the gynecologist for a consultation (to switch brands of birth control) and I requested an ultrasound to check on you two. She couldnt find a heart beat. On Monday I started to feel these excruciating pains. I started to bleed. Yesterday, Tuesday, you- Victorino Alejandro Castañeda II...came out. I held you in the palm of my hand. I ran my fingers over your tiny little body. Your feet. Your legs. Your torso. Your arms. Your hands. Your little head. Though not fully developed- it was still apparent the traits you got from both me and your father. You had my nose. You had your father's slightly deformed ear. I wept over you. I talked to your father last nite. I told him about you. He cried hysterically. He let me know how much he cared. How much he loved you and your brother. To-day I buried both of you- Victorino Alejandro Castañeda II and Paolo Guiseppe Castañeda- in the woods at the dead-end of my street. I made little head-stones for the both of you. I painted your names and the date on them. I decided to give you your father's name, Victor, out of respect for him. Knowing that he loved you. Knowing that he really did want you to hold in his arms. And you, Paolo, I named after your Grandfather- my Daddy- Paul Castellano. He never knew about you. But if he did, he would have done his damnedest to help me provide for you. Boys, I want you two to know that your father and I did want you. Your father was just thinking about my welfare. See, with my disease- childbirth would have been nearly fatal. We did care about you. And we miss you terribly. We love you both with all of my heart. (The phone just rang. Victor just called me crying over you. He would have made an amazing Daddy.)

Dayton Thomas Belmont (Baby B) Stillborn 1-23-06 Hi sweet baby boy. I miss you so bad. Sabin (Baby A) is doing great. I wish you were here by his side like you should be. Like you were from the start. But now you are in a better place. You died of Interuterine Growth Retardation I just found out. I am glad we didn't have you all cut up in an autopsy. There was no need for it. Everyday I think of you and will never forget you. But so bad do I wish I could have taken your place. God, If Dayton were here I would teach him about you so now that he is there please teach him about me. Dayton, baby you earned those wings. You fought so hard! We love and miss you so much. Watch us from Heaven like I know you already are. We Love You, Mommy, Daddy, brother Cander and twin brother Sabin

My angels, i will never forget you, although i never met you i carried you and loved you both dearly. life can be the cruelest thing in the world and to have you both taken from me fills my heart with pain. i will never forget my little angels, mummy x x

Parker, We love and miss you dearly! You are the first person we think of each morning and the last each night. Thank you for inspiring us the way you do! You gave us the greatest 20 hours of our lives baby girl! www.parkersingletary.com

Bilbo--my sweet little one. I never was able to hold you in my arms, but sometimes in my dreams I do hold you. I was so excited to have you growing inside of me. I still can't believe that you are not here any more. I think of you all the time and I will never forget you. Your Daddy and I love you so much.

Michael Gerard - My Little Man July 17, 2006 You were a gift from above. I loved you from the very beginning and still do. There are tears....tears of sadness, love, and joy for you. You were born on July 17, 2006 at 11:18 in the morning by c-section and you cried. I heard my little boy cry outloud. And then the doctors had to help you breathe. After several hours, I received a call that you were not responding well to treatment. As asked, you were brought to me and I held you in my arms and your Daddy stood at my side while you took your last breath. You were a beautiful, sweet little boy. Your Daddy said you looked like me and I say I could see your father in you. Today when I look at your Daddy, I see you. Never forget you were wanted, you were real and you are loved.

Sheyenne, Grandma loves and misses you so much. It has only been 3 weeks since I last saw your little face and held you in my arms. Mommy and Daddy miss you as well. You touched the hearts and souls of your entire family at 30 weeks. We will all miss you and forever have a hole in our hearts. Rest in Peace my Little Angel. Born 15 July 2006 Died 15 July 2006 Due 20 Sept. 2006